Fair Sex, according to the definition developed by the Åland Islands Peace Institute, is:
- mutual – everyone involved have said ”yes” to sex and it is possible to stop at any time if anyone feels uncomfortable.
- feels good – this does not only consider physical pleasure, we believe one should have a comfortable and safe gut-feeling. One does only what one feels ready to do.
- safe – neither you, nor your partner, are hurt and everyone involved take responsibility for unwanted pregnancies and avoiding STI:s (sexually transmitted infections).
Fair Sex should be mutual, feel good and be safe before, during and after the sexual act.
In order to fulfill the criteria for having ‘Fair Sex’ with someone, it is of the upmost importance to communicate with each other throughout sexual activity and to be observant of the reactions and body language of one’s sexual partner. It is the responsibility of the person who wants to engage in sexual activity to ensure that he or she has the consent of the other rather than making it the responsibility of the person who is exposed to unwelcome sexual behavior to say ’no’. The focus of the Fair Sex workshop lies therefore on a combination between nonverbal communication and verbalizing and communicating one’s feelings, wishes and intentions in sexual situations for preventing any type of sexual misconduct.
It is not Fair Sex if:
- you feel pressured to do something that you don’t want to do
- It makes you feel sad, used or filled with anguish
- You are unsure of if your partner/s consider it to be Fair Sex
